Real Men are Passionate

I know what you’re thinking. “Dan you have of the most stoic personality I’ve ever known, you’re not passionate. Does this mean you’re not a real man?” There are three possiblities to examine; 1) Passion is not a hallmark of a real man. 2) I am not passionate and therefore not a real man. 3) The world has confused you with a counterfeit passion and you need to be reminded of what biblical passion looks like. I’ll examine each of these in turn.

Is passion a hallmark of a real man? Excellent question. Hollywood occasionally tells us no, a real man is not passionate but stoic ruled by reason. The apathetic leading man, Sherlock Holmes, Batman, etc. These characters are not common and usually not successful in the theater. Who wants to go watch a movie about a boring man? Would you want to watch a movie about Eyore the donkey? More often Hollywood creates a leading man that is over the top in his passion. Think about Forest Gump, William Wallace and Maximus Decimus Meridius. These characters sell tickets. We’re drawn to these men, they’re leadership and passion are attractive to us. But are these real men? What does the ultimate authority teach us, what does the Bible say? Jesus was described as having a “zeal for your house will consume me” (Psalm 69:9, John 2:17). This was recalled by the disciples from Scripture immediately after he turned over the market tables in the temple court. This statement was followed by an even more passion laden state from Christ himself. “Destroy this temple, and I will raise it again in three days (John 2:19).” The words are dripping with passion. I can see the movie scene in my head. How much better is this scene than Forest Gump repeatedly yelling “Jenny!” Christ was passionate. Christ had a singular passion. Salvation. Nothing else mattered. He dined with the dregs of society. He alienated the powerful. He altered his friends (the disciples) schedule so that he could call a tax collector out of a tree, “Zacchaeus, come down immediately. I must stay at your house today (Luke 19:5).” I’m struck by the work must. Then in verse 10, Jesus’ mission statement, his passion “For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost." Jesus was a man of passion. We are to be perfect as Jesus (our Father) is perfect. Real men are passionate!

So now argument two, that I (Dan) am not a real man. Perhaps you’re right. In your view, I’m not outgoing. I’m not excitable. I don’t have (many) fits of rage. I’m controlled, collected even confident (maybe). I’m not going to win any Oscars. I can see how you might mistake these traits as a lack of passion and desire. So what is the big deal if I’m not passionate? The truth is that if I am not living with passion I am not living like Christ and by definition I am living in sin. I am not going to argue that I am not living in sin. All who breathe live in sin. It’s the human condition. This is why repentance is so vital. I understand that given my personality you could argue that I don’t have great passion and therefore am not a real man. I forgive your ignorance. Let me explain by looking at the third possibility. What are desire and passion?

Desire is a funny word because it is not often used as a synonym for passion but in truth they are synonymous. Society has perverted the words because they’re desires, they’re passions are perverted. The world desires things of the world, more money, more sex, more power. Desire is not merely a want, and passion is not merely an emotion. The world offers a counterfeit to what Jesus really has for you. The world can offer fabulous wealth, if you work hard enough. Jesus offers you eternal life with him, in heaven, if only you’ll accept him as Lord. Do you see the dichotomy? The world tells you that passion (and love) is an emotion. To the world desires the pretty woman walking down the road with no regard for what is best for the woman. Selfish, in the moment, desire rules. This is not a true desire. It will never satisfy. Do you notice how unhappy the world has become? More stuff, more achievements, more luxuries to satisfy a desire they don’t understand and can’t fill. The truth is that emotions are fleeting, often controlled by external conditions. The sun is shining so I’m happy. My wife just kissed me so the world is right. These are the desires of a boy not a man.

The Bible shows that passion is a driving force that cannot be changed by wafting emotion. Desire, passion is the force that drives you to do the things that benefit the Kingdom regardless of the cost to self. Passion and desire are actions just as love is an action. Just as James warned us that faith without actions are dead, passion is in the same fold. Look at the writers of the New Testament after the crucifixion. Each of these men deeply desired, a God given desire, to preach the Good News. The desire was so strong that it did not matter what happened to them as long as their mission was moved forward. Insults, shipwrecks, arrests, beatings, stoning, boiling alive (and John survived) and murders didn’t stop these men. They considered themselves blessed when they were persecuted for name of Jesus. God given desires are bigger than individuals. These desires are selfless. Think of Christ in the Garden. “Father, take this cup from me but let your will be done.” The desire is bigger than the individual. Christ wants a biblical desire to dwell in our hearts. Jesus had biblical desire, “to seek and save the lost.” This is exactly what we, as Christians, are called to desire. It is the Great Commission. However, I believe that the Bible also tells us that each man is given a special desire on his heart as well. God has gifted some to be apostles, some teacher, some pastors, some prophets, etc. (look at Romans 12:6-8, 1Cor. 12:27-29 and Ephesians 4:11). These are just a few of the gifts that are to be used in the church body, preparing the body for service (Eph. 4:12). These desires are consistent with the Great Commission but may be a little more detailed, guiding the Christian man as to how to reach the multitudes. It’s Christ’s individual call on your life.

So what are your gifts? You need to find out. Examine your desires and put them into action. This act alone will lead to tremendous growth in your spiritual walk with God. What are you waiting for? Where are you driven? For example, I've been given the desire to teach and disciple new believers, especially men and couples. Leading through example, through relationship, through work of God in my life to help develop strong Christians who can in turn pour their gifts out. This desire is what drives me to meet with men one on one, to write these devotions, to seek out men that I know God is prompting me to connect with. It’s not in my natural personality. Given my natural self I would rather fade into the background, refuse to lead and go and do my own thing. But like Peter, Paul, James and Jude before me, I am happy to be a slave to Christ and a servant to the church. One owned by Christ not the world. A royal priest and joint heir with Christ. Given the passions of the King rather than my own selfish and shortsighted wants. Christ has made me a real man.

In His Service,
Dan